I realised today I look for safety outside myself in the things & people around me.

I “have” a partner.

Hmmm have is an interesting word. We have made a commitment, but I don’t own him. He is not under my control. He is free to do as he pleases. I don’t really have him at all. It’s an illusion I have created, a trap I gladly become ensured in to feel safe.

I don’t actually “have” anything.

My house, car, phone, husband, friends, family, body aren’t mine, I don’t have them. Yet I look for safety, comfort & love in them.

I fear what will happen should they leave, become incapacitated or die. My safety is misplaced, outsourced. No wonder I hold so much fear in my body when I place safety outside myself in my illusions of ‘having’.

I borrow, share space, relate, inhabit, but I don’t “have”. There is no ownership.

Even my body, I cohabit with trillions of microbes that far outnumber my human cells. It will continue to change, as do the seasons & all life. My body will break down & replenish the soil as it decomposes. It is a wonderful vehicle to inhabit, but I don’t own it. It is borrowed & must be returned.

All things change. That’s life. It’s a good thing. Without change there would be no growth, no learning & no evolution.

Let go of the fear of losing what you don’t actually own.

What do I own?

Love.